I felt well and truly stuck in the mental health system. I felt helpless after feeling not heard during the MHA assessment. I felt in despair. This time I was without baby boy as he was over 12 months old. I had been split up from my protective factor.
I arrived at the out of area hospital with just my handbag. They didn’t have much to check. I was given a sandwich, assessed by a Psychiatrist and went to sleep in the clothes I arrived in.
This hospital was nothing like the Unit I was in. It was awful. I stayed in my room 99% of the time and due to the side effects of Aripiprazole was agitated and would pace in my room. On one occasion a nurse found me standing in my room in the dark as I was pacing. The Stanford psychology experiment by Dr David Rosenhan in 1973 under the title “On being sane in insane places” came to my mind. What was an innocent event would be interpreted as mentally unwell behaviour.
Unfortunately my admission into hospital fell on a bank holiday weekend so I had a longer wait to see the psychiatrist assigned to me. I made it clear to the nurse in charge that I wanted to be seen as soon as possible as I did not belong in hospital.
When ward rounds finally happened, my husband was present with me with a notebook and pen to hand. As we sat at the table my husband swiftly sat down, opened up his notebook and got ready to write. The psychiatrist not knowing he was my husband, must have thought he was my solicitor. I certainly thought so as I observed my husband do this. The standing in the dark in my room was mentioned by a different psychiatrist present and made out to sound like I was being mad. Thankfully the other psychiatrist who was assigned to me ignored the observation and moved the conversation along. I was going to stop Aripiprazole and start on Risperidone. He promised I would be reviewed again at the end of the week and could possibly be discharged.
Psychologist and Patient 